I'll share you mine if you share me yours

I was watching Beth Moore and her husband on James Robison's show this morning. They were talking about a common misconception about marriages. Beth said that she and her husband fight a lot, she called it heated discussions, whatever you want to call it. Even as seasoned as they are as Christians, Betty and James Robison said they still have fights. Beth said beware of couples who act like or even brag that they don't fight. She said, now there's a marriage with no communication, no passion, just 2 people co-existing. She said she refuses to become that couple so she and her husband "risk" that by having heated arguments. By now, they've established rules for their arguments that make it conducive to get some resolve to their argument.

So don't feel bad if you and your spouse argue. It doesn't mean that you aren't a perfect couple. I've got news for you, you aren't the perfect couple. GET OVER IT!! None of us are! Being able to have heated discussions is a by-product of not settling for a blah marriage. I think the more constructive thing to do is to come up with ground rules before heading into said discussion.

For example, James Robison said that if your spouse says something that hurts you, we know that a loving spouse would never intentionally hurt the other. So assume that you misunderstood what they said and ask them to clarify their point another way so you can understand it without getting hurt.

So do us all a favor and share (don't hide) any revelations or experiences that another married couple would benefit from. I wonder what other ground rules would help keep an argument from going south?

Milestone coming up

Jacob is known for saying random things. So I tend to tune him out sometimes, although I'm making a conscious effort not to do this. The other night I was was laying down with him and he told me his tooth was loose. (he says this a lot if he's around another child who has a loose tooth) so I started to disregard him but thought I would do some investigating first. And sure enough, wouldn't you know it one of his front top teeth is loose. Not really loose, but you can tell it is getting loose. I know this day would come. And to tell you the truth, I'm quite upset that after all those nights staying up with him when he would be cranky from teething, are you serious, now its falling out? It is a rite of passage. One that makes me realize how fast he is growing up. It scares me sometimes because little moments like this catch me off guard and that's when I have time to think about bringing him home from the hospital.

The good thing is that it makes me really appreciate Maggie and where she's at developmentally because its a reminder to hold on to times that maybe I let slip through my hands with Jacob.